First Steps After Separation

The breakdown of a relationship, whether by choice or circumstance, can be complex and challenging. Often people feel overwhelmed and unsure about what next steps to take. If you can, we strongly recommend obtaining legal advice prior to separating, however that option may not always be available to you.

In Australia, the Family Law Act 1975 sets out the legal framework for divorce, the division of property and parenting arrangements after a relationship breaks down. An experienced family lawyer can provide valuable legal advice and guidance when it comes to navigating these issues.

The breakdown of a relationship is a difficult time during which you could be managing the engagement of lawyers, the emotional impact of separation, concern as to how you are going to support yourself financially and care arrangements for your children.  It is helpful to consider the practical solutions to these pressing issues. Below are some  practical matters that you may need to consider and how to address them:

Living Arrangements

• Accommodation and housing will naturally be a concern. You’ll need to decide who stays and who leaves the family home which might be influenced by employment needs, children’s schooling, and nearby family support. In some cases you may both be in the family home for a period of time, despite being separated.

• Before you move out of the family home, we strongly encourage you to obtain legal advice on what would be the best option for you. Subject to that advice the following may apply:

• If you are renting, decide who will stay in the current home, notify your landlord and have the rental agreement updated. If you have a mortgage, inform your bank of your separation and any decisions made regarding mortgage responsibilities.

• If you are moving out, you will need to explore housing options that fit your budget and lifestyle, which can be particularly difficult in the current market. Ask friends and family for referrals and support.

• If you are relocating, make sure you change your address with various organisations, and for added security, you may want to consider renting a post office box and creating a new email address.

Children and Schooling

• For families with children, it is important for the children’s well-being that they maintain the consistency of their school environment, if possible. .

• If you can, establish a temporary agreement as a starting point, which can lead to a more formal arrangement later. Maintaining consistency for the children is desirable in most cases. If possible, stick to your children’s current schooling and childcare arrangements to maintain stability in their lives.

• Meet with school and childcare administrators to inform them about the separation and keep them notified of any changes so they are aware of the situation and can help. Schools often offer support and resources to help children cope with the change.

• Coordinate with the other parent to work out a plan for childcare/school pickups, extracurricular activities, and parent-teacher meetings. Consistency and cooperation in these areas can significantly reduce stress for children.

Banking and Accounts

• Consider whether it would be appropriate to contact your bank to discuss your mortgage, joint loans, savings accounts, credit cards and whether there are funds that could be drawn down which you would like to put on hold.

• It would be appropriate to open a separate savings account so that you can have funds that are secure. Major banks generally have online resources and checklists to help those who have separated to work through their banking needs.

• Protect your privacy by updating passwords and login details for online banking accounts, email, social media platforms, etc.

Property and Record Keeping

• Secure your personal documents and items of significant personal value to you. Ensure you have all necessary identification, financial records, and personal valuables in a safe place. Obtain originals or copies of important documents like passports, marriage certificates, birth certificates and insurance policies.

• Ensure that your property (your home, other real estate, motor vehicles, boats, etc.) remain insured. Failing to retain insurance, should the unforeseen happen, can have devastating financial effects. Ensure that arrangements are in place for these expenses to be met.

• Prepare a list of assets and liabilities (and account balances as of the date of separation). Property, shares, investments, bank accounts, superannuation, mortgages, loans, and credit card accounts will all be relevant when it comes to finalising your property settlement.

• Document the date of separation and keep a journal to record other significant events and timelines. This can be important information when it comes to applying for a divorce,  determining deadlines for filing court proceedings and the suitability of parenting arrangements, if this becomes necessary later.

Support and Assistance

• Contact the Department of Human Services to discuss whether you are entitled to financial assistance and, if necessary, to apply for child support.

• Create a trusted support network and enlist help from friends and family as well as professional counselling or therapy, if needed. Family Relationships online – https://www.familyrelationships.gov.au/ provides various resources and information to help families and relationships. You should also speak with your General Practitioner about whether a mental health plan would be suitable for you.

• Lean on your support network. Friends, family, support groups, and professional counselling can provide the emotional support needed during this challenging time. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help, and reaching out for professional guidance is a prudent way to navigate the complexities of separation.

Moving Forward

Don’t put off getting quality legal and financial advice from qualified professionals.

Consider making or updating your Will and other documents such as a power of attorney. You should also review your superannuation and life insurance policy, as relevant, as you may wish to make changes to the beneficiaries. Your lawyer can provide guidance and advice on these important estate planning areas.

Separation demands both emotional resilience and practical solutions. Fortunately, there are resources available to help you navigate these difficult times. We understand the sensitivity and intricacies inherent in family law matters – the legal and the practical issues – and our goal is to provide comprehensive advice  and guidance to all our clients.

This information is general in nature and does not constitute professional advice. If you or someone you know wants more information or needs help or advice, please contact our Family Law Specialist Alison Brown or phone us on (02) 9923 2321.